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Worthless Jedi Absolutely Humiliated By Cunning Novice

Astros mascot Orbit, who is also apparently a Jedi, was challenged to a lightsaber duel by Indians shortstop Francisco Lindor on Friday. Gotta say, I am starting to believe more and more in Luke Skywalker’s bitter “actually the Jedi are busters” preachings:

MLB Warns Mike Clevinger For Having Fun With His Cleats MLB Warns Mike Clevinger For Having Fun With His Cleats

Mike Clevinger recently wore some cleats embossed with a pretty chill custom cosmic elephant paint job that artist Jonathan Hrusovsky characterized as having a “#bohemianelephant” vibe.

Indians Pitchers Ponder The Existence Of Multiple Earths Indians Pitchers Ponder The Existence Of Multiple Earths

Carlos Carrasco carried the Cleveland Indians to a 6-2 win over the Brewers this afternoon. But all the fun for the AL Central division leaders didn’t seem to come until after the game, as shown by a Twitter poll put out into the world by Cleveland pitcher Brady Aiken.

Trevor Bauer, Lover Of Logic And Facts, Casually Suggests Astros Are Doctoring Pitches [Update] Trevor Bauer, Lover Of Logic And Facts, Casually Suggests Astros Are Doctoring Pitches [Update]

Professor Trevor Bauer is at it again. The Indians pitcher and science knower weighed in on a question to Driveline Baseball founder Kyle Boddy about whether the Houston Astros’ pitching staff could be using some sort of illicit substance to increase their spin rate:

ESPN Fawns Over The Intelligence Of Trevor Bauer, Who Is A Big Dumb Asshole ESPN Fawns Over The Intelligence Of Trevor Bauer, Who Is A Big Dumb Asshole

Cleveland Indians pitcher Trevor Bauer is one of those athletes who seems custom-built to confuse sportswriters. ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick is the latest to get hoodwinked.

Francisco Lindor Dinged A Homer In San Juan And Everyone Went Nuts

Cleveland and Minnesota are playing baseball in San Juan tonight, which marks Puerto Rico’s first meaningful MLB game since 2010. That makes this otherwise pretty random April match-up extremely meaningful for Cleveland’s most lovable player—shortstop Francisco Lindor. Lindor was born in Caguas, 20 miles from San…

MLB Prospect Sues Lending Firm For "Unconscionable" And "Exploitative" Behavior MLB Prospect Sues Lending Firm For "Unconscionable" And "Exploitative" Behavior

Big League Advance Fund is a company owned by former MLB pitcher Michael Schwimer. The company, of which Browns President Paul DePodesta is a board member, is apparently in the business of seeking out up-and-coming baseball prospects and paying them a chunk of money up front in exchange for a massive cut of their…

In Celebration Of Jackie Robinson Day, MLB Presents Racist Commemorative Cap In Celebration Of Jackie Robinson Day, MLB Presents Racist Commemorative Cap

This is the sort of disgraceful bind an organization works its way into when it offsets the progress of finally acknowledging the offensive nature of a team’s racist caricature logo by then continuing to sell merchandise featuring the racist caricature logo in order to appease the team’s very worst fans:

Indians Fans Taunt, Mock, And Scream Obscenities At Native American Protesters At Home Opener

The Cleveland Indians finally made the decision to at least scale back the use of the Chief Wahoo logo, starting next season, when the racist caricature will be removed from Indians uniforms, mostly so that the Cleveland Indians will be allowed to host the 2019 MLB All-Star Game. It’s a half-measure, and a cynical…

And Here's An Inside-The-Park Home Run By ... Edwin Encarnacion?? And Here's An Inside-The-Park Home Run By ... Edwin Encarnacion??

This isn’t as iconic an entry into the genre of unexpected inside-the-park home runs as, say, this Prince Fielder gem or this Jhonny Peralta one, but it’s still pretty dang good: Edwin Encarnacion tonight, with his first inside-the-parker in more than a decade, thanks to a little defensive fuck-up by left fielder…

Baseball Hall Of Fame Retires Chief Wahoo Before The Cleveland Indians Baseball Hall Of Fame Retires Chief Wahoo Before The Cleveland Indians

Cleveland Indians legend Jim Thome got a well-deserved first-ballot Hall of Fame nod this year, and after some apparent discussion, as well as a specific request by Thome, the slugger will go in on a plaque bearing the Cleveland “Block C” logo, rather than the “Chief Wahoo” Native American caricature that Thome wore…

Roger Goodell Assures Everyone Washington Football Team Will Remain Racist Despite Chief Wahoo Removal Roger Goodell Assures Everyone Washington Football Team Will Remain Racist Despite Chief Wahoo Removal

After the Cleveland Indians announced that they’ll be taking Chief Wahoo off of team uniforms by 2019, the Washington NFL team naturally drew scrutiny. Would they follow suit and ditch their comically racist name for something more palatable, or at least scrub their logo for something more neutral?

MLB Says Cleveland Indians Will Get Rid Of Chief Wahoo On Uniforms In 2019 MLB Says Cleveland Indians Will Get Rid Of Chief Wahoo On Uniforms In 2019

The Cleveland Indians will no longer sport images of their racist mascot Chief Wahoo on team uniforms starting in 2019. Major League Baseball announced the change this morning, saying in a statement that the caricature was “no longer appropriate for use on the field.”

Cleveland, Minnesota To Extend Safety Netting At Ballparks  Cleveland, Minnesota To Extend Safety Netting At Ballparks 

Cleveland and Minnesota became the latest teams to say that they’ll extend the protective netting at their ballparks before next season, joining a slew of other clubs that made similar announcements after a young girl suffered bleeding on the brain from being struck by a ball at Yankee Stadium in September.

Cleveland And Michael Martinez Continue Codependency  Cleveland And Michael Martinez Continue Codependency 

Exciting hot stove news: Cleveland has signed Michael Martinez to a minor-league contract. Again. This will be his sixth stint with the team. (Fittingly enough, Martinez also has six career home runs.) All those moves in one handy place for those scoring at home, as compiled by MLB.com’s Jordan Bastian:

Didi Gregorius Keeps Getting Better Didi Gregorius Keeps Getting Better

Corey Kluber was great against eight out of nine Yankees last night. To those eight hitters, over 3.2 innings, Kluber gave up one hit, and he struck out six. In the biggest game of the year, he was almost fine. The problem was, one guy was a big problem for Kluber: A 27-year-old shortstop from Amsterdam, one who spent…

Aaron Judge Looks Lost Aaron Judge Looks Lost

The Yankees managed to erase a 2-0 series deficit and advance to the ALCS, which is great news for Yankees fans and even better news for Aaron Judge, who has a lot less attention on him today than he would if the Yankees had fallen last night.

So Is Corey Kluber Hurt, Or What? So Is Corey Kluber Hurt, Or What?

Corey Kluber’s shortest start of the season came in Game 2 of the ALDS. His third-shortest start game in last night’s Game 5. In between, his second-shortest start of the season, was a May 2 outing in which he was pulled after three innings with a lower back strain, with which he was placed on the DL and missed a…

Brett Gardner Works Brett Gardner Works

For the length of 26 batters, from the moment the Indians chased CC Sabathia from the game in the fifth and got the Cleveland crowd back into things, until the moment Brett Gardner worked—and there is no better word than worked—an epic at-bat in the ninth, Game 5 of the ALDS was about as tense as games get: A…

Cleveland Beaten By Yankees And By Themselves Cleveland Beaten By Yankees And By Themselves

The Indians’ catalogue of postseason failure is fairly lengthy, but it is not especially varied. There are, after all, a lot of different ways to lose—blowouts and gentle fades and attempted comebacks that can’t come back enough. But Cleveland’s recent history of loss here is almost exclusively defined by singular…

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