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You're the Worst Has Been Renewed for Its Fifth And Last Season You're the Worst Has Been Renewed for Its Fifth And Last Season

You’re the Worst, a show about two shitheads who somehow fall in love with one another despite each being terrible, will air for one more season. And then that’s it.

Spicey Out  Spicey Out 

Following what appears to have been the worst (and tannest) six months of his grim little life, the New York Times reports that Sean Spicer has resigned from his position as White House press secretary. I would say we’ll miss seeing him regularly dissolve into an incoherent puddle in the briefing room, but those…

It's the Weekend, Eat Out of Your Mom's Mouth

Like we are currently doing with our mom.

Huma Is Free Huma Is Free

Hours after dick pic enthusiast and serial harasser Anthony Weiner pled guilty for transferring obscene material to a minor, Huma Abedin filed for divorce.

Ringling Bros. Circus Is Shutting Down, Oh Well Ringling Bros. Circus Is Shutting Down, Oh Well

After nearly 150 years in the circus biz, Ringling Bros. is hanging up its lion tamer pants. The culprit is high operating costs, paired with the fact that animal-based circuses are bullshit.

After Nearly a Month, Pat McCrory Concedes to Roy Cooper in North Carolina Governor's Race 

In a video released on Monday, Republican North Carolina Governor Pat McCrory ended almost a full month of political maneuvering and protest filings and conceded the gubernatorial election to Democrat Roy Cooper, who won with a slim but decisive margin that’s grown to about 10,000 votes.

I Love It When You Leave New York I Love It When You Leave New York

You left New York City—congratulations!

Bye, I Hate It 

I moved to New York two days before starting work at Gawker in the fall of 2014. When I walked up the stairs to the office in Soho I was acutely unsure of how to hold my body so I wouldn’t seem terrified: the only person I knew in the building was Emma, who had taken me to Jezebel from the Hairpin, where it had just…

New York's Poop Bag Nightmare Is Over, For Now 

A man who tried to cover two women in poop on New York’s Upper East Side has been caught. That being said, I’m still out of this city.

A Man in New York Tried to Shove a Bag of Poop Down a Woman's Shorts, Goodbye 

A man on Manhattan’s Upper East Side attempted to shove a bag of poop down a woman’s shorts on Monday. I can’t live here anymore, bye.

No One Cares How Hot Your Pizza Was, John Kasich No One Cares How Hot Your Pizza Was, John Kasich

On a visit to Gino’s Pizzeria in Howard Beach, Queens on Wednesday, an irritable and apparently disturbed man from Ohio ate a slice of pizza with a knife and fork. He was ridiculed far and wide, because you can’t do that. On Thursday morning, he went on Good Morning America to explain himself.

Namaste, Cuntface: What I Learned When I Got Dumped By My Super Spiritual Friend Namaste, Cuntface: What I Learned When I Got Dumped By My Super Spiritual Friend

In the last six days, I’ve gotten dumped by a good friend and had a major spiritual breakthrough.

Farewell to Marco Rubio, Who Just Dropped Out After Losing His Home State of Florida  Farewell to Marco Rubio, Who Just Dropped Out After Losing His Home State of Florida 

There’s a special sting in losing your home state, and Marco Rubio has all the time in the world to feel it tonight after announcing he will “suspend” his bid for the White House. The GOP race is officially down to only the most hideous choices, a.k.a. the only ones Republican voters will apparently consider.

Meghan Trainor's New Song 'No' Boldly Takes on the Experience of Listening to Meghan Trainor Meghan Trainor's New Song 'No' Boldly Takes on the Experience of Listening to Meghan Trainor

“Let me stop you there before you speak,” sings Meghan Trainor, in her boldly meta new single “No,” which is a sonic departure for the artist—reminiscent of the Y2K pop era, rather than the ‘60s—but otherwise aesthetically consistent with the rest of Trainor’s oeuvre in the way its vibe is sort of “haunted wing of…

Canadian Island Politely Offers Americans Refuge From a Trump Presidency Canadian Island Politely Offers Americans Refuge From a Trump Presidency

A radio host from Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia has set up a website called Cape Breton If Trump Wins to pitch the beautiful yet underpopulated island to terrified liberals. So far, he has received hundreds of serious inquiries.

Williamsburg Apts Come With Built-In Slack Channel, as the 'Sharing Economy' Remains Lonely as Fuck Williamsburg Apts Come With Built-In Slack Channel, as the 'Sharing Economy' Remains Lonely as Fuck

One of the most depressing things about the so-called sharing economy—the recession-induced workforce transition in which everyone hustles twice as hard to piece their shit together except for a relatively small group of selectively lazy and self-deluded individuals who rejoice in replacing all physical interactions…

A Brief List of Some of the Many Terrible Things Antonin Scalia Said and Wrote  A Brief List of Some of the Many Terrible Things Antonin Scalia Said and Wrote 

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia died at the age of 79 on Saturday. It was an apparently peaceful death, by all accounts, in his bedroom at a West Texas luxury resort after a weekend of quail hunting. He has children and grandchildren and Ruth Bader Ginsburg to mourn him; let’s not do that here. Because Scalia,…

Carly Fiorina Suspends Her Campaign, Issues Odd Statement About Feminism Not Being 'Ideology' Carly Fiorina Suspends Her Campaign, Issues Odd Statement About Feminism Not Being 'Ideology'

On Wednesday at around 3 p.m., Carly Fiorina suspended her presidential campaign. She posted a lengthy statement to her Facebook page:

Genius Annotates a Pitchfork Review and Every Music Critic Bursts Into Flames  Genius Annotates a Pitchfork Review and Every Music Critic Bursts Into Flames 

Welcome to hell: today Pitchfork ran a review about the debut major label album by Wet, a Brooklyn band that some of us at Jezebel like and some of us don’t, which is all very fine by the standards of human agency. Because music critics are called “music critics,” the review, by Katherine St. Asaph, was somewhat…

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