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Chaos Weary Chaos Weary

About a year ago, in early 2017, I briefly joined a stress-management program that functioned sort of like a support group. I was feeling brittle and panicked; alongside millions of other Americans, the generalized anxiety that normally keeps me company had grown exponentially in the aftermath of the 2016 election.

L.A. Vegan Restaurant Owners Say They're Facing Death Threats For Killing and Eating Animals At Home  L.A. Vegan Restaurant Owners Say They're Facing Death Threats For Killing and Eating Animals At Home 

The owners of a vegan mini-empire in Los Angeles are facing outrage and protests over news that they’ve been raising and slaughtering animals at their Northern California farm. Matthew and Terces Engelhart, who run the Cafe Gratitude chain, say they’ve received death threats over their private meat-eating.

People Are Pissed at Cosmopolitan for Calling the Kardashians 'America's First Family'  People Are Pissed at Cosmopolitan for Calling the Kardashians 'America's First Family' 

Ok, so. Out of all the myriad worldwide injustices readily available for consumption via the reading device of your choosing, we have elected to be outraged about a trolly editorial decision made by Cosmopolitan magazine. The print edition.

Chris Harrison, Don't You DARE Give Bachelor in Paradise an After-Show Chris Harrison, Don't You DARE Give Bachelor in Paradise an After-Show

ON THE HEELS of an EARTH-SHAKING casting announcement (bad lipstick Juelia! Two crazy Ashleys! “My name is” Carly! FREAKING TANNER WITH THE SEXY ROSACEA, #TEAMTANNER, HELLO!), Bachelor in Paradise host Chris Harrison has made the VERY CONTROVERSIAL decision to do a weekly after-show called After Paradise, effectively…

Mother Outraged Over Unsightly Vagina on Teddy Bear Cake Mother Outraged Over Unsightly Vagina on Teddy Bear Cake

Of all the things you’d imagine people would be legitimately outraged by, the genitals of teddy bears doesn’t immediately top the list. One mother in England, however, can’t get over the fact that her precious child’s christening cake looks like it’s showing off a whole lot of camel toe. Do you see it?

Catholic Group So, So Mad About Tom Ford's Cross-Shaped Dick Pendant Catholic Group So, So Mad About Tom Ford's Cross-Shaped Dick Pendant

In case you have not noticed, The Catholic Establishment freaks out whenever religious iconography is "desecrated," aka someone else besides them is making money off it. In the latest case, noted homophobes the Catholic League are freaking out because Tom Ford put a dick in the shape of a cross at the end of a…

Janet Jackson's Nipple: A Retrospective

This week's Super Bowl is the tenth anniversary of the legendary "wardrobe malfunction" that exposed Janet Jackson's right nipple to the world. The story carries implications far beyond the Super Bowl. Janet Jackson's nipple—or, more broadly, the criminalization of female nudity (and our culture's animosity…

Inverted Breastfeeding Mom’s Instagram Account Inexplicably Suspended Inverted Breastfeeding Mom’s Instagram Account Inexplicably Suspended

Yogic breastfeeding mom Amy Woodruff, the woman whose inverted Instagram breastfeeding pose attracted lots of attention and unsolicited criticism from internet strangers (the most helpful kind of criticism), has been booted from Instagram, presumably for being just a pubic hair too naked for Instagram’s delicate…

Sadly, Yet Another Woman Has Reportedly Been Gang-Raped on a Bus in India Sadly, Yet Another Woman Has Reportedly Been Gang-Raped on a Bus in India

No, you have not been sucked into a horrible Groundhog Day bog of news quicksand — police on Sunday said that they arrested six men suspected of raping yet another female bus passenger in India. The distressing report comes a mere four weeks after the deadly gang rape of a student on a bus in the country's capital…

Irrelevant Homophobes Newly Enraged Over JC Penney Ad Showing Lesbian Couple Being Happy Irrelevant Homophobes Newly Enraged Over JC Penney Ad Showing Lesbian Couple Being Happy

One Million Moms, a hateful collective of a few thousand insufferable busybodies, has once again called for its members to break out the torches and pitchforks and attack JC Penney. At issue is a single page in the department store chain's May catalog that depicts a lesbian couple doing horrible, abominable things…

No, Abercrombie Isn't Selling 'N***** Brown' Pants No, Abercrombie Isn't Selling 'N***** Brown' Pants

We received multiple tips today with links to an online store that calls itself the Abercrombie & Fitch Outlet, to a product in the store called "N***** Brown Pants." Using a racial slur as a youthful, carefree, and edgy touch in a product name would be a totally fucked up, racist thing for Abercrombie to do — if the…

Parents Hilariously Outraged Over 'Vile' Male-Stripper Fundraiser Parents Hilariously Outraged Over 'Vile' Male-Stripper Fundraiser

Presumably tired of staid bake sales and well-behaved silent auctions, some frisky parents at a British school decided to raise funds for their kids' education by hosting a ladies' night complete with male strippers. Unsurprisingly, some parents didn't approve.

Straight Couples Fight For Right To Domestic Partnerships Straight Couples Fight For Right To Domestic Partnerships

A British organization is fighting for "heterosexual equality" in domestic partnerships — and they say this will be good for gay couples too.

The Situation Room: A Palin/Letterman Album Of Outrage The Situation Room: A Palin/Letterman Album Of Outrage

The shitshow continues! The Good Governor is now expressing her outrage over Dave's lousy jokes to CNN. (NOW's got in on the action too.) After the jump, an (occasionally) updated roundup... because we don't have the energy for anything else.

The O Ring The O Ring

The NY Post reports that Barack Obama has bought Michelle Obama a rare $30,000 diamond-encrusted rhodium ring from Giovanni Bosco as a "thank you" gift for putting up with his 2-year national campaign for the Presidency. Predictably, there's some outrage from the conservative Post, which notes that the country's…

Twiggy Hosts New Clothing Swap Show • Nightclub Overturns "No Fatties" Ban Twiggy Hosts New Clothing Swap Show • Nightclub Overturns "No Fatties" Ban

ixties supermodel and former ANTM judge, Twiggy, will host a three-part TV show about clothing swap parties that are apparently a huge trend somewhere. • Women in the Krebet village in Indonesia are keeping the ancient craft of batik wood figures and textiles alive thanks to the growing popularity for batik items in…

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