Michael Ballaban's posts - Greek uPOST

Automakers Are Begging Trump For Tighter Fuel Economy Standards Automakers Are Begging Trump For Tighter Fuel Economy Standards

Good morning! Welcome to The Morning Shift, your roundup of the auto news you crave, all in one place every weekday morning. Here are the important stories you need to know.

Here's What The Ford Raptor's Suspension Looks Like When It's Running Off Road Here's What The Ford Raptor's Suspension Looks Like When It's Running Off Road

The 2017 Ford Raptor is all big turbo engine, enormous body, and the beefiest Fox Racing shocks this side of a baja truck. That suspension is damn near all the fun in the Raptor, and this what it looks like when it’s actually being put to work.

When You Should Spend $70,000 Or $150,000 On A BMW Sedan  When You Should Spend $70,000 Or $150,000 On A BMW Sedan 

Hello, my somewhat wealthy friend. You’ve worked hard in your life to earn your riches. You deserve nice things. Things like a 2017 BMW 530i. You’ve earned it. Go on, get it. Oh wait, you’re not somewhat wealthy—you’re stupid wealthy? Well, then. Fuck everyone. Get an Alpina B7. Here’s what $150,000 gets you over…

We're The Staff Of Jalopnik, Let's Chat We're The Staff Of Jalopnik, Let's Chat

It’s a Friday afternoon right and it’s hot as hell out. We’re taking it easy, just like you, and once again we’re blatantly stealing this idea from Deadspin. Come chill.

Disgraced Former Top Gear Host Chris Evans Is Still The Highest Paid Presenter At The BBC Disgraced Former Top Gear Host Chris Evans Is Still The Highest Paid Presenter At The BBC

Chris Evans, everyone’s favorite one-season Top Gear shouty man, is getting paid £2.25 million (or $2,932,447.50) by the BBC, according to a report from the British government broadcaster. But the weird thing is, even though it’s not for Top Gear, it’s at least in part because of Jeremy Clarkson.

Tesla Is Finally Fixing Its Board Tesla Is Finally Fixing Its Board

Good morning! Welcome to The Morning Shift, your roundup of the auto news you crave, all in one place every weekday morning. Here are the important stories about corporate governance best practices and sometimes interesting things you need to know.

The French Army Just Celebrated Bastille Day By Playing A Daft Punk Medley The French Army Just Celebrated Bastille Day By Playing A Daft Punk Medley

France is a country, so to celebrate its national holiday, Bastille Day, it puts on a huge military parade. And because France is a Chill and Cool country, it celebrates by making its military play a bunch of Daft Punk, France’s most accomplished robots.

Comment Of The Day: The Only Good Take About Our Broken Alfa Romeo Edition Comment Of The Day: The Only Good Take About Our Broken Alfa Romeo Edition

One of the Alfa Romeos we’ve got out of the press fleet broke down on us last night. There were many searing nuclear takes about what we did wrong and how we are bad people because of it, but this is the only good one.

The Alfa Romeo Giulia Is The Perfect Unreliable Italian Car We've Always Dreamed Of The Alfa Romeo Giulia Is The Perfect Unreliable Italian Car We've Always Dreamed Of

BONG BONG BONG. The dashboard had lit up like a Christmas tree. Power was gone. The whole car started shuddering. We were in a 2017 Alfa Romeo Giulia with just barely 1,709 miles on the odometer, and it was already breaking down.

I Have Questions About This Door I Have Questions About This Door

Hello. This is the Aston Martin Valkyrie. It doesn’t have doors. It has a circular hatch, and I have no idea what anyone’s supposed to do with it.

This Guy Drifting And Doing Burnouts In A 90-Year-Old Bugatti Is Living His Best Life This Guy Drifting And Doing Burnouts In A 90-Year-Old Bugatti Is Living His Best Life

Many words are written about the Goodwood Festival of Speed, and how there are lots of crazy rally cars and trucks and whatnot flying up a hill. But I just want to appreciate this 1927 Bugatti Type 35B, which was absolutely flogged around the track like it should be.

You Don't Deserve A Chevrolet SS But Go Get One Before It's Too Late You Don't Deserve A Chevrolet SS But Go Get One Before It's Too Late

Take a look at yourself in the mirror. You have bad opinions and you only buy massive heaps of dumb shit. You don’t deserve anything good. “But I deserve nice things, I’m a nice person!” No. You’re terrible. You all never bought a Chevrolet SS, and now they’re gone with no replacement. Chevy finally got the thing…

Autonomous Car Law Is About To Start Making Some Sense Autonomous Car Law Is About To Start Making Some Sense

Good morning! Welcome to The Morning Shift, your roundup of the auto news you crave, all in one place every weekday morning. Here are the important stories you need to know.

What Are The Cars In Game Of Thrones? What Are The Cars In Game Of Thrones?

The world of Game of Thrones is very nearly unfathomably huge, so it makes sense that everyone drives cars there. But what cars do they drive?

Turbo Teen

Now that i think about it, I’m not sure I fully understand the premise of 1980's hit television sensation, Turbo Teen. Like, I accept the premise that he was both a car and a Cool Teen. That I’m fine with. But was there anything he could do as turbo teen that he could not do previously as just… a teen with a car?

Ferrari Might Be Building A Crossover, Maybe, I Guess, Reportedly? Ferrari Might Be Building A Crossover, Maybe, I Guess, Reportedly?

Every so often there comes a rumor that Ferrari is building some sort of crossover/SUV thing, and the inevitable response is something about Ferrari chairman Sergio Marchionne’s dead body. It’s another day on Planet Earth.

Twelve Porsches Burnt At The Stake In Most Glorious Protest Against Capitalism Twelve Porsches Burnt At The Stake In Most Glorious Protest Against Capitalism

Capitalism, a bankrupt economic ideology which rests on the notion that the outright theft of the product of others’ labor is morally right and just, has produced a car company called Porsche, which makes cars primarily for those who benefit most from that ideology. Twelve of those cars were burned last night.

Check Out The Sweet Suspension On This Boat Check Out The Sweet Suspension On This Boat

“Suspension... but for boats” sounds like the sort of thing you’d imagine when under the influence of the devil’s lettuce. But one company is actually making boats that can absorb the punishment of an angry sea, and it looks like the idea might actually work.

When you bought a Renault Espace Quadra, you were forced to wear these fetching outfits for the rest of your days, unto eternity. That’s a FACT.

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