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The Final Installment Of The Engelb Vielma Tracker, Featuring The Greatest Anagrammed Hits The Final Installment Of The Engelb Vielma Tracker, Featuring The Greatest Anagrammed Hits

Many—most?—Orioles games feel vaguely pointless right now. The end result is usually clear before the game is underway, and while there’s plenty of different ways for the team to reach that result, those differ only in substance rather than sentiment. It’s all going to be pretty depressing. This was especially true in…

The Sixers Blew It The Sixers Blew It

With a little more than five minutes remaining in the first half tonight, Robert Covington drained a three, stretching the 76ers’ lead over the Celtics to 21 points. Philadelphia was in control here, with no signs of loosening their grip. And then they sent all of that to hell. Over the next quarter and a half, they…

LeBron James Remains A Damn Miracle LeBron James Remains A Damn Miracle

The No. 1 seed Raptors, again, built a first-half lead tonight only to squander it, losing 128-110 to fall behind 2-0 in their second-round series against the Cavaliers. And while it may be tempting to file this one away as yet another classically Raptorsian playoff performance, there’s only so much—which is to say:…

A Very Special Edition Of The Engelb Vielma Tracker: Let Viable Man Single! A Very Special Edition Of The Engelb Vielma Tracker: Let Viable Man Single!

The Engelb Vielma tracker is back, and this time it holds some excellent news for the utility infielder. When we left the 23-year-old last week, he had been sent down to Triple-A. But he was called back up to join Baltimore’s big-league club yesterday, and today—well, today, he got his first hit.

Report: Donald Trump Spent Quality Time Last Week Talking Football With Bill Belichick Report: Donald Trump Spent Quality Time Last Week Talking Football With Bill Belichick

In 1993, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen found time between Full House episodes to record an album called I Am the Cute One. Songs include “I Am a Kid,” “I Love to Scream,” and “No One Tells the President What to Do.” The last of those is a celebration of the truth of its title—the president can do whatever he wants, and…

Former Washington DT A.J. Francis Rips Team On Instagram After Signing With Giants: "Your Logo Is Racist" Former Washington DT A.J. Francis Rips Team On Instagram After Signing With Giants: "Your Logo Is Racist"

Defensive tackle A.J. Francis signed with the New York Giants today after being released by his former team, Washington, on Monday. He celebrated the move with an Instagram post that’s way more good riddance than goodbye.

Yoenis Céspedes Busts His Chain, Scatters Diamonds On Diamond  Yoenis Céspedes Busts His Chain, Scatters Diamonds On Diamond 

Yoenis Céspedes paid a high price for a one-out double in the first inning tonight against the Braves. After sliding into second, he realized that his chain had broken—leaving gemstones all around the bag. While none of his teammates were able to bring him home, second baseman Asdrubal Cabrera did stop to collect some…

Pedro Alvarez Clotheslines Teammate Chance Sisco

The Orioles are the worst team in the American League by record—8-20, tonight’s ongoing game against the Angels not included—and by just about everything else, too. (See: a collective OPS of .673.) Here’s a play from tonight that sums all that up pretty well: Pedro Alvarez running into Chance Sisco and laying the poor…

Drake And Kendrick Perkins Start An Amusingly Lopsided Feud At Game 1 Of Cavs-Raptors Drake And Kendrick Perkins Start An Amusingly Lopsided Feud At Game 1 Of Cavs-Raptors

Noted Toronto fan (and former failed basketball player) Drake stirred a little beef with Cleveland bench goon Kendrick Perkins during tonight’s Raptors-Cavaliers Game 1. It started with some words at halftime...

Raptors Prove That They Can Choke Spectacularly Even When They're The Top Seed Raptors Prove That They Can Choke Spectacularly Even When They're The Top Seed

After jumping out to an early lead, the Raptors caved and let the Cavaliers take a Game 1 victory in overtime tonight, 113-112.

Nigel Hayes Says That He And Wisconsin Teammates Discussed Boycotting 2016 Game To Protest NCAA Nigel Hayes Says That He And Wisconsin Teammates Discussed Boycotting 2016 Game To Protest NCAA

At a panel discussion on college sports this week, as reported by USA Today, basketball player Nigel Hayes said that he discussed boycotting a 2016 game with his Wisconsin teammates to protest the NCAA’s failure to properly pay its athletes.

Josh Hader Is Striking Everybody Out Josh Hader Is Striking Everybody Out

Josh Hader wasn’t supposed to be the highlight of Milwaukee’s bullpen. He was coming off a strong rookie year, but the star of the relief corps was going to be closer Corey Knebel, fresh off a record-setting strikeout streak from 2017. But then Knebel went down with a hamstring injury in the first week of April, and…

The Celtics Gave The Sixers A Game-One Beatdown  The Celtics Gave The Sixers A Game-One Beatdown 

The 76ers had nearly a week off between closing out their easy first-round series against the Heat and kicking off their second-round one against the Celtics, and it showed. Against a Boston squad missing Jaylen Brown, who was sidelined with a hamstring injury, they couldn’t hang—getting beat down by a final score of…

Corey Seager Is Out For 2018, Adding To Team's Extremely Long List Of Present Woes Corey Seager Is Out For 2018, Adding To Team's Extremely Long List Of Present Woes

Los Angeles Dodgers shortstop Corey Seager will miss the rest of the season after undergoing Tommy John surgery, the team announced today.

Here Are Your 2018 First-Round NFL Draft Picks Here Are Your 2018 First-Round NFL Draft Picks

The first round of the draft is over! Here’s what happened:

Ryan Shazier Walks On Stage To Announce The Steelers' First-Round Pick Ryan Shazier Walks On Stage To Announce The Steelers' First-Round Pick

Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker Ryan Shazier walked out on stage to announce the team’s first-round pick at tonight’s draft—one of only a few public appearances that he has made since suffering a serious spinal injury during a game in December, and the first one in which he’s been able to walk without assistance.

Report: The NHL Called The Bruins To Ask Brad Marchand To Stop Licking Other Players Report: The NHL Called The Bruins To Ask Brad Marchand To Stop Licking Other Players

The NHL called up the Bruins to let them know that Brad Marchand should not be licking or nuzzling his opponents, as first reported by SportsNet and later confirmed by ESPN. 

Baker Mayfield Receives Honor Of Being Next Doomed Cleveland QB Baker Mayfield Receives Honor Of Being Next Doomed Cleveland QB

Cleveland took Oklahoma QB Baker Mayfield with the top pick off the board in this year’s quarterback-heavy first round.

Russell Westbrook Brought The Thunder Back Russell Westbrook Brought The Thunder Back

The Thunder weren’t supposed to get this one. Down 3-1 in their first-round series against the Jazz, and down by as many as 25 points as late as the middle of the third quarter tonight, this elimination game felt pretty damn close to a foregone conclusion. Until it felt like something else—a ridiculous comeback,…

Once Again, Here Was LeBron  Once Again, Here Was LeBron 

With a little more than seven minutes to play in the fourth quarter of tonight’s Game 5 between the Pacers and Cavaliers, Kyle Korver made a three. That was the last field goal that Cleveland would score until the buzzer sounded.

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